Every so often our church does a weekday night worship service. This is a service where we gather to do worship in a less formal manner than Sunday. It’s mostly that – just worship. A lot of singing, praise, prayer, etc.

Sometimes it’s a struggle to attend these since they are usually on Wednesday nights and I’ve got kids to take care of, school, work the next day and so on. It typically plays out with me looking forward to it all week until its actually time to go.

I’m tired, exhausted from the day. The kids are busy with homework. I still have a million things left to do. The thing I’ve learned though is if I take the time and effort to commit and to go, I always get way more out of it than I expected.

This week’s service was not a disappointment. In a broad sense, this post is a companion piece to The Atheist because it represents someone on the other side of the ‘spiritual coin’. Go ahead and read that post linked if you want, it’s an interesting story of how God’s hand is present in so many ways.

These services are very intimate compared to the usual Sunday service. They are much smaller crowds, very open in their faith, and very unfettered in just worshiping God. It’s an emotional experience – if you are willing to accept the atmosphere and the love that is present at that moment.

Anyhow, what struck me about the experience was the lady behind me. I never saw her, I didn’t turn around. I could only listen to her voice. She was very softly proclaiming her devotion and her love for Jesus the entire service.

What was so emotional was how composed her words were, how sincere and vulnerable she was at that moment. I was a little distracted by it since I was there to participate in the singing and worship, but when I got home her words were still on my mind. The more I thought about it, the more I realized how special that moment was, and must have been for her, and it honestly it hit me pretty hard.

Almost a week later her words are still on my mind. I know that it was a moment I was meant to hear and to share… What an amazing journey this has been.

SESSION NOTES: TBD

WORD OF THE DAY:

God, I don’t know how

Call it whatever, the devotional/word/sermon/message of the week, I use all those terms – I just know that it comes from God and often the subject changes until I finally say “Yeah, that’s it, that’s what God wants me to speak about..” Like this week I started with a topic, thinking I would write about ‘God will do it anyway’, then changed it to ‘spiritual maturity’ and finally landed on what you’re reading now.. “God, I don’t know how.”

Its fitting really, what I just said, because its true. I don’t know how.

How to pick the message I’m supposed to give. How to make it not about me. How to speak clearly. How to speak wisdom. How to make the right words come out. And so on. But God does. And that’s the point of this Sermon.

God, I don’t know how.

The thing is when you don’t know how, you are in exactly the place God wants you to be in because He does know how, and He’s going to lead there. Everyday that you believe in Him, trust in Him, let Him guide you He will give you the ‘how’ piece by piece.

Right now a good bit of my how is the how of other spiritual leaders. They are my mentors, people that I love & respect & learn from.

Pastors like Erwin McManus, Christine Caine, Michael Todd, Mark Batterson, Steven Furtick (whose sermon this is based on), etc. I was once told when I was learning to be a boxer that a lot of guys try and emulate the style of their favorite boxer, but I needed to make my own way and have my own style. This is as true in boxing as it is in preaching. I’m still learning my own style and I’ll get there one day. God will lead me there.

But until then I’ll be leaning heavily on my spiritual mentors who are shaping me & teaching me how to convey God’s message. This just came to me: Leaning. Learning. Leaning is learning. Sometimes you have to lean so you can learn.. You just can’t let that leaning become a crutch, however.

What I pray for everyday is a simple prayer. Prayer doesn’t have to be complicated. Jesus isn’t impressed by your prayer’s four and five syllable words. Its what comes from your heart and the sincerity of your spirit that counts.

These are my words to God:

“Lord, give me the strength to do your will and accomplish my calling and reach as many people as possible and bring as many people as I can to your Word,” AMEN!

That’s it. I don’t know how it’s going to happen and that’s OK because where I’ve arrived at in my spiritual journey is I no longer have worry or stress or ask about that part, its going to happen & I’m gonna leave that part up to Him.

Why? Three simple words… because of faith.

PSALM 55:2 sums this up perfectly, “Cast thy burden upon the LORD, and he shall sustain thee: he shall never suffer the righteous to be moved.”

If you can believe in that, I can tell you from personal experience that giving your burdens to the Lord, truly giving your burdens to Him will change your life.

But where do you go from there? This was one of the hardest things for me. For me to grasp hold of, because I like to grasp things, control things, make things go my way – that’s part of who I am.

I had to grasp and take hold of the fact that I couldn’t grasp this or hold it any longer – I had to let go and say “God, I don’t know how”

Show me. Show me, God…

This is one of the most courageous things you will ever do in life. It was one of hardest things I’ve ever done.. to let go and say “God, I don’t know how, but I know that You do.”

That’s the starting place for spiritual growth

To admit “I don’t know how”

How do I look at and believe in something that I can’t see?

How do I watch all these sermons, preaching redemption, and be saved?

“I don’t know how.”

You don’t have to…

You have a part you will play, and you will know what to do. The rest is up to God.

The bible mentions so many times “the seed”. The kingdom of God is like a seed. His Word is the seed. You don’t have to know how the seed grows, but you have to plant it, and water it, and let the dirt do its work on its own time. Man there is so MUCH in that statement. So much I’ve said before about this, it’s not your timetable it’s His. It’s not your plan, its His. It’s not about knowing, its about believing.

Plant that word in your heart. Water it. Read the scripture. Reflect on it. Do it daily. Live it. Let the dirt, let your situation, do its work. Its not pretty. Dirt never is. But it’s necessary. Are you receiving this?

It’s all about the cooperation between what we do know, and what we don’t – the part that God knows. That’s the part where faith steps in.

All the fruit that we bear, has to start somewhere. it starts with a seed, that is planted. That grows. That remains, in the dirt. For as long as necessary – until it sprouts and grows strong and bears fruit.

And the last thing I’ll leave you with is this reminder.

Who is the fruit for? The fruit is not for the tree.

It is for others.

Empty Spaces, Empty Places

What got me thinking on this was something a friend said, regarding being single & dating. About filling your heart’s empty spaces with God first – and not with someone else.

Filling those empty spaces with His word and not looking to fill the emptiness in your heart with a relationship. Where you end up building that person into an idol, to worship above God.

Seek God first, and then the rest will fall into place.

I realize how important this is in a larger context, because we as human beings do we not like empty spaces.

We’ll fill it with pretty much anything we can that makes us feel less alone, less ’empty’. We’ll fill it with new purchases, with drugs & alcohol, sex, superficial relationships, etc.

Anything we think will fill that emptiness. And it’s always something we think we’re sure will satisfy us. And make us happy. And the biggest deception of all – that the happiness will last.

The thing is, we as humans will do anything to avoid emptiness. We avoid it for the simple fact that that’s where pain lives.

There’s always been a level of pain in emptiness. Always has, always will be.

It’s one of my favorite topics to write about. Seasons of pain, seasons of loneliness, seasons of separation. I’ve always written on what I know. I’ve learned through my life experiences that pain is the currency of progress. And what I’ve learned through my Salvation is there is also divine purpose in pain.

I can’t state that enough – there is God’s PURPOSE in your pain. I wrote a sermon with that title recently, exploring that concept from a standpoint of God. You can read it HERE

Pain. Isolation. Frustration. Condemnation… You ever feel like that when you are alone? I know I do, but I bet I’m not alone in feeling that, but I think that I am alone in feeling it…

Isolation is one of the Devils primary weapons against us.

There’s a great verse comes to my mind on this and really illustrates that point:

“Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil.” (MATTHEW 4:1)

Notice It doesn’t say He was led into the market. Or He was led into the synagogue. He was led into a place where he would be vulnerable – into the wilderness, alone…

Empty, dark places are one of Satan’s favorite hangouts. Why? because he knows that in there, he’s got a captive audience, and he knows he’s got you at a time when you are weak.

If you think Satan looks like a charming Al Pacino like in the movie “The Devil’s Advocate” then you’re already one step into his grasp. I can promise you that as a human being alone you have no power to stand up against the devil. Its only through God’s protection and God’s intercession that the devil can be sent fleeing.

Be mindful of what else lurks in those empty places.

That is the time to be vigilant.

You can expect an attack from there, so have your armor of faith ready. Forewarned is forearmed as they say.

If you’re thinking “I should just avoid those places all together.” Like driving by that street, the one with all the abandoned houses and no streetlights, graffiti everywhere and say no way I’m going down there, and you just keep driving. Well, you can’t…

You have to go down that road in life. We all must travel that lonely road at some point.

Because there’s something in there, in that emptiness that is so valuable its worth the pain & the discomfort you’re going to experience.

Believe it or not there is something we all need in emptiness.

Jesus himself knew this.

I’ll give you two examples from the Bible:

“Yet the news about Him spread all the more, so that crowds of people came to hear him and to be healed of their sicknesses. But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.” (LUKE 5:16)

“It was very early in the morning and still dark. Jesus got up and left the house. He went to a place where he could be alone. There he prayed.” (MARK 1:35)

Sometimes even Jesus had to be alone, with Jesus… (credit to Ps. Steven Furtick)

You need those empty places.

It’s where you go to build your foundation & strengthen your pillars of faith. Its where you go to discover yourself.

A place where you go to cut out all the noise and distraction of this world and realign yourself with your PURPOSE.

We all need to do that from time to time. Realign ourselves with who we are and what we believe in.

Here is also where you set your boundaries in the Lord’s word. And as a follower of Christ, you’ve got to have those boundaries. I can’t tell you how important it is in this life to be able to set against this world and those you let into your life, the defensive lines that you can’t and won’t allow to be crossed.

Because to do so compromises who you are and what you believe in. Boundaries are what guard your integrity

And that’s important, your integrity in life is everything.

What you let into your life should never ever, and I mean never compromise your integrity.

When you are receiving into your life the right things and the right people it will be those that not only love and support you but are willing to help you achieve your purpose. They may or may not share the same purpose as you, but they share the same integrity and have a willingness and a desire to help YOU achieve your purpose.

So, you have a choice. What do you want to fill your empty places with today?

Amen.

“Here’s the thing I found out.
I found out it really doesn’t matter who causes it.
If it’s from God or if it’s not from God…
I don’t really know the difference sometimes.
What I know is that whatever happens in our lives, it has to pass
through His hands.
So, whether it came from His hand or whether it was from the enemy is not the most consequential
thing.
The most consequential thing is whether I will partner with what God is doing even if
it’s not what I prefer.
Will I resist it, or will I push against it,

or will I go with it?”

-Pastor Steven Furtick

++We serve a BIG God++

Everyone has a story.

You also have a supposed to be that goes along with that story…

“I was supposed to be married”

“I was supposed to have a nice home”

“I was supposed to have a family”

“I was supposed to be happy”

“I was supposed to be in love”

“I was supposed to retire”

“I was supposed to be healthy”

“I was supposed to have my life together”

You get the idea. All of us in our mind have a story of what your life is supposed to be.

For the most part it comes from what society has told you. You’re in your 30’s? You’re supposed to be married and have kids. You’re in your 40’s? You’re supposed to have a career and a stable job. You’re in your 50’s? You’re supposed to have grandchildren and a retirement plan. You’re in your 60’s? You’re supposed to be retired and living a life of leisure.

Is this really obtainable? How many people do you know who were supposed to do these things and it worked out for them? Worked out just fine, right?

But it’s what we are supposed to be.

Supposed to makes you feel like you are stuck, it feels like a weight that you can’t get out from under. And wouldn’t you really, really like that weight lifted off of you? Of course we would.

Wouldn’t that benefit you? No. It would not.

It wouldn’t because you are stuck, but not in the way you think… You’re stuck in a story about yourself, about a future you’ve already decided will never happen, and a past that you can never change.

That’s what it really means to be stuck.

I know this from experience when I was called and God spoke to me. He spoke to me and told me what I was to do – and I told Him that it will never happen. I didn’t even give it a chance, I rejected myself before it even began.

“I can’t do this”, “I don’t have the strength”, “I’m not capable…” I’ve said all of this to God, many times, because I was stuck in a story about myself…

But what’s so important to realize is you are in a story that’s so much bigger than you.

With God the story is always BIGGER than YOU.

When you get stuck in yourself, you miss the point that God is doing something that is bigger… much bigger than you. Its bigger than what’s hurting you. It’s bigger than the time you think you’ve wasted and bigger than the opinion of others – that all of us care so much about.

When you tell God you are stuck, when you say, “I’ll never be able to do this, God”, when you make it about you – You’re limiting God to the size of your biggest problem. Think about it.

God is so much BIGGER than that. You can’t even begin to comprehend his plan – a plan that includes you but is so much more than you.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” (ISAIAH 55:8-9 NIV)

I love to quote from ISAIAH, and this verse is perfect. ISAIAH is my go-to book of the bible. A little bit of backstory on that – His name in Hebrew means “God is Salvation.” I have ‘ISAIAH 45’ tattooed on my chest, along with a silhouette of a falcon (a reference to Cyrus the Great liberating Israel).

In fact, my tattoos and my decision after my salvation to show my faith to the world in that manner are a reference to another verse in ISAIAH:

“Behold! I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually before me.” (ISAIAH 49:16 KJV)

Depending on how you view of the meaning of the original Hebrew word “charath” in that verse, it generally means “to carve, engrave, inscribe” which many scholars believe is meant to convey that God has all of our names engraved, or tattooed on His hands.

This a powerful image and reminder of God’s commitment and remembrance of His people. It is a message that He will never forget them or forsake them.

Simply put, my tattoos are a permanent reminder of my vows to God to never forsake or forget Him in my life.

The idea for this devotional came about one night thinking about my life and His calling for me, and how in the heck I’m going to get there. I don’t think I’ve ever told anyone the full details of the vision God gave me after my salvation in 2021, but he pretty much told me in exact terms what would be my future. Well beyond the original words spoken to me by God on the day I was saved.

My honest response to that is I wish God had not told me that. I don’t want that responsibility and don’t think I can handle that, ever. There’s no scenario or way where I could ever see that become a reality in my life.

Maybe saying that diminishes me in the eyes some, but as I’ve said before – Sometimes I’d rather be real than right in life.

I think the few people who’ve read my devotional posts would see its obviously been difficult for me to accept my calling and have a faith strong enough to believe in what seems impossible will not only be possible someday – but a certainty.

What God proclaims over your life will happen. One way or another, His words are always fulfilled.

That is what got me thinking about how I view God. And I’m probably not alone in that view, all of us see God in terms of what our human mind can comprehend. After all, He sent His only son Jesus to us by becoming human.

When we say something is impossible, we forget that nothing is impossible with God.

In fact, not only do we serve the God of the impossible, that’s His modus operandi.

Our God loves the impossible, and “impossible” odds are his favorite type of odds!

Why is this? Because impossible odds set the stage for some amazing miracles. For the simple fact that there is no greater way for God to demonstrate His glory than through making the impossible happen – every single time.

So, if He is the God of the impossible, then just how big is the God we serve?

There are almost 8 billion 8.2 billion people now on this planet since this post was originally written.

Imagine all the prayers of those people that He’s keeping track of, but really that’s just small change for Him. You see God already knows every second of the entire lives of all 8.2 billion people.

And as impressive and “impossible” as that may seem…He also knows the space in-between each second of the 8 billion people’s lives – and every living creature that ever existed. Both in the past and that will exist in the future. For infinity.

There’s a common saying in statistics on probability,

“Given infinite time, even most improbable outcome becomes a certainty.”

Well, our God created infinity. Think on that one if you can.

Scientists also say the smallest measure of time is called Planck time. It’s basically a brief ‘blip’ of time that lasts just 10 ^-43 seconds. Which is just 0.0000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 seconds.

Any moment shorter than that, quantum mechanics can’t tell whether it’s the past or present.

Do you know where God is? He’s in the space that quantum mechanics says can’t exist.

And for every one of those 8 billion people on this planet, and for every creature that has ever existed – both in the past and will exist in the future.

And you are worried that God might not help you make your car payment?

Remember, we serve a God who invites us to defy impossible odds.

When David (the future king of Israel) was still a Shepard boy, he told Saul these words,

“Your servant has killed both the lion and the bear; this uncircumcised Phillistine (Goliath) will be like one of them, because he has defied the armies of the living God.” (Samuel 17:36 NIV)

David didn’t ask God to shrink his problem. He asked God for the strength and the power to conquer his problem.

And he did.

So then how BIG is the God you serve?

AMEN

The Currency of God’s Confidence

If you’re going through things right now, things that are difficult, things that are painful and you want to have faith, you want to believe, what you’re saying is I want to be confident in God’s will in my life.

That confidence doesn’t come easy – especially when you’re sitting at the bottom, of whatever it is that’s going on your life… Maybe you’ve got a loved one who is sick, maybe you feel like you’ve lost everything and are starting over again. You’re looking up and thinking “How am I going to do this God?”, “How will I get over this mountain?”

It is hard to be confident in those situations. Where you feel like there’s no way you are ever going to get from where you are, at the bottom of that mountain, all the way to the top and over that mountain in front of you.

Do you know what God is saying at that moment of doubt?

He is saying is “I am confident in you for what you can’t even believe right now.”

“I am confident in you for what you can’t even believe right now…”

He knows you’ve never been through this before and what He’s telling you is this – I know where you are right now, and I want you to do something. I want you to borrow my confidence.

Because if you do I will see you through this. I am the creator of the universe and I promise you that I will see you through this.

How would that feel to have that confidence? Pretty good… But you’ve got to go to Him and borrow it.

Borrow that confidence and say, “God I can overcome anything in your name that is thrown against me!”

That confidence is what you believe – about what you can be, about what you have inside of you, and what you believe about what God has called you to do and what you believe about what you’re going to do…

That is the currency of confidence.

Every single one of us has been borrowing confidence our whole lives. You probably just never thought about it.

The problem is we borrow confidence from the wrong places… and when you borrow confidence from the wrong places, the interest rate is ridiculous.

It’s worse than that check cashing place on the corner.

We are so used to borrowing confidence from the wrong places. It’s pretty much where our confidence comes from these days.

We borrow it from our physical attractiveness. We borrow it from other people who we need to validate us. We borrow it from body count. We borrow it from shallow Instagram pictures. We borrow it from self-serving Facebook posts. We borrow it from the number of likes we get.

We borrow it from every single place on this plant that never had sufficient funds to begin with.

Here’s the thing – You will never repay what you borrowed from these places.

Stop borrowing from them. Stop borrowing from empty people, empty spaces and empty places & start borrowing from God.

When you do, you’ll find yourself getting to that place where you aren’t just borrowing – because His confidence pays dividends.

What you borrow from God you will eventually become. You will become confident. Confident in what God has called you to do. That this is who I am and this is what God made me for and this is what He’s given me to get the job done, to accomplish His purpose.

The people & places you used to go to for validation, the ones who should have supported you, the ones who now criticize you – they no longer matter. You don’t need to borrow any longer from their insecurities & their emptiness.

And let me tell you it’s a wonderful feeling to know that everything, every single thing you need to believe in yourself, can come from God.

Feel like you don’t fit in anymore? That’s fine. You’re too big for that small place you came from, just keep growing… keep being true to yourself and what God has called you to.

Here’s the other thing, when your confidence comes from God, no one can take that away from you.

If they walk away, He won’t. If they criticize you, He won’t. If they fall short, He won’t. If they betray you, He won’t.

If the earth and sky pass away, He will still be there.

So, where do you want your confidence to come from?

Seasons of Separation

As we lead into the new year this will probably be my last post on seasons of pain. In my life the season of separation has ended. The storm has passed, I was told this by God recently and I believe him. The challenge for me (and I’m sure others) is to stop running from the things that God wants to use to lead us into our purpose.

I believe that for those who follow and trust their lives to faith, God never intended us to fit in and our greatest effectiveness is in our uniqueness -in those ways that make us distinctive from others – that is where our power, and our greatness (in God) lies.

That greatness is a product of separation which is preceded by preparation.

I know from experience that the seasons of separation I have experienced have been the hardest of times my life. But this season of separation is preparation for a purpose. I’ve got that purpose outlined for the upcoming year and will post about it at the beginning of 2022. That said;

God has to pull you away from comfortable circumstances to propel you into your calling. Separation is preparation.

I believe that one hundred percent

Moses had to spend 40 years in Midian in the desert separated from his people in order to go back to his people and lead them to a place that they no longer believed they were fit to go.

Sometimes God has to pull you away from people, and sometimes God has to pull you away from comfortable circumstances to propel you into your calling.
Think about this – We read in the bible that Jesus oftentimes went away when it was early to go and pray; away from Peter and away from John and away from James…

Sometimes in order to fulfill your calling you have to be separate. You have to separate yourself from others. You have to endure, the pain, the heartache, the loneliness. Sometimes God sets you apart for a purpose and for a reason.

Moses is a great example of someone who lived a life of separation. He knew what it was like to be separated, to be living in one place but to have come from another. Some of us, myself included, know that feeling all too well; what it’s like to be separated from your background, to be separated from the things that that that are in your blood. Maybe no one in my family or yours cares about God, or goes to church, or has a desire to change the world, or to help others.

But I am different. I’m going to fulfill my calling; I’m going to fulfill my purpose – because I am different there’s a separation.

Do you hear what I am saying?

Sometimes it feels like life is pulling you apart between your past and your present, between who you were and who you can be and you don’t know what to do. I’ve been there. Been there so many times in my life. But if you have faith and can believe and trust God – He will speak to you.

I didn’t see a burning bush like Moses did, but I did speak with God in July of 2021 and He told me exactly what I was called to do and what my purpose was. I’ve written about that many times at this point, its why I’m writing this post – but what I want to emphasize here is answering that call was the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life. Answering that call lead into a season of separation for the preparation for what my purpose is.

Basically, what God is saying is I want you to separate yourself from who you are and who you were so you can see Who I am – and that I have chosen YOU and I’ve made you distinctive… I’ve set you apart, I’ve given you a destiny.

Much like Moses I’ve had all sorts of excuses for God – Well I’ve never lead others before, I have fear, I’ve suffered from loneliness, I’m disorganized, I don’t have the strength, and on and on… But God has said, ‘Your distinctive feature isn’t all those things, your distinctive feature is the strength I will give you.‘

What God is saying is you need to separate yourself from your excuses, from your view of yourself / from My view of you. I need you to separate yourself from your excuses so you can embrace my purpose.

He is telling you you’re separate on purpose. You’re here for reason in this season.

When God starts something in your life it isn’t always pretty, it isn’t beautiful. For some it might be, but I believe for the vast majority of us it is painful, it is chaotic. It is a separation from who we were to prepare us & lead us into who we were meant to be.

God is separating us from our past. He’s separating us from our sins. He’s separating us from our dysfunction.

What’s interesting is the way that God leads us out of situations and into purpose – it isn’t usually a straight line. I know in my life God gave me some instructions that seemed insane. I don’t know how I will live up to that, but that’s OK because God does.

He could certainly take you straight into your purpose but that’s not how God works. Because you & I wouldn’t be ready for it. I’ve talked a lot about that, how there is purpose in pain, etc.

Because God gets the greatest glory out of your life in the face of the greatest resistance – so it’s not always easy and it’s not supposed to be.

Think about it – How can people see how strong your God is if your battles are never fierce?

Sometimes when it seems like you’re going backwards, all God is doing is creating a space where he can bless you.

99.99997% of what we worry about…God has already worked out.

Think on that for a moment.

So when you are laying in bed at night thinking about something. Something that you’re afraid might happen, something you’re afraid might never happen, something someone did to you, something you did to someone – it doesn’t matter. That’s right, it doesn’t matter. Isn’t there more than that? No. It doesn’t matter.

You’re staying awake worrying about something that God has already worked out.

You have to have a sense of priority too… To realize is that Christ is our solid rock, but if you don’t know how to stand on that rock with the right balance – the devil will push you around and you will always feel unsettled. You will always feel tossed and turned about, but when you make up your mind what does matter and what doesn’t matter, the 99.99997% of the things we worry about, what people think of you, the validation we think we need from others, the confirmation and the credit we feel has to come from outside of us…it doesn’t matter.

It doesn’t matter.

What matters is getting your balance back – That you find your equilibrium, that you keep your faith and you keep a grateful attitude that you don’t let your situation contaminate your spirit because if you don’t sort this out you will live in constant imprisonment to your own fear & worry & indecision.

Stop trying to create so many options too – what you’re doing is only creating more opportunities for anxiety.

Stop compromising your integrity – this is a huge source of anxiety.

Stop being in so many pieces – it’s hard to have peace when you are in pieces.

The word integrity means whole.

It’s hard to pray panic & anxiety away when your own lifestyle is creating it. When you have to figure out which mask to wear for what situation.

Its hard to have peace when there’s a work me, an after work me, a weekend me, a Sunday morning me, etc. It pretty hard to manage all those “Me’s” at all different times, all the time…

Get the picture?

As I write this, this is me. And it’s kind of hard for me to ask God to bless a life that is divided in so many different directions.

You can bring a different approach to different situations, but the essential nature of who you are remains unchanged in every encounter. To me this is my definition of integrity.

You might be anxious because you are trying to manage so many different versions of yourself, and if you would bring it all together and just be honest before God and just ask God what David did:

“Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” (Psalm 139:23-24)

You are already accepted because Jesus died on the cross for you –

Ask God to help you align your life with what He made you to be so that you can be the real you and say “I want to be the real me, the highest version of me that I’m called to be. God loves me and I don’t have to prove anything to anyone, and I don’t have to be anybody else…”

Ask God to search you. God’s Word can enable your heart to transcend your fear & anxiety. God doesn’t make mistakes, He never made anything imperfect according to His purpose. The peace of God passes all understanding, use it to guard your heart and mind in Christ…

Letting Go

One thing you can count on in this life is being knocked down.

Sooner or later, no matter how well things are going, something will happen that will knock you to the ground, maybe even cause you to lose your faith and your trust in God. You’ll be faced with a situation that no matter how hard you try to control it, it spirals out of control….

You might even end up in place where you’re begging & pleading with God just to give you the strength to make it through the day, that you can’t survive this on your own.

You’ve tried to do the right thing, you practiced forgiveness, you went to those who had hurt you, or who you had hurt – and asked for them to forgive you. Only to have it blow up in your face.

Maybe even to the point of telling yourself ‘I’m sick of this’, ‘I’m sick trying so hard to live God’s Word’, ‘I’m sick of being in pain’, ‘I’m sick of writing messages of hope & faith when I’ve lost all hope and faith’. ‘I’m sick of telling people I’m fine when I’m falling to pieces on the inside.’

God, I’m done!

For me when I tell God I’m done, what I’m really saying is “I don’t know what else to do.” “I can’t carry this burden any longer”.

What I realized however, is this – “What if I’m not supposed to be carrying this burden?”

The bible tells us:

“Cast thy burden upon the LORD, and he shall sustain thee: he shall never suffer the righteous to be moved.” (PSALM 55:22)

We hold on so tightly to things we can’t control.

And here’s the kicker… the more we try to control, the tighter the grip we place on it. Sooner are later it starts to hurt. You’re holding onto something so hard you can’t do anything but hold on tighter…

But God says, “If you’ll let it go, I will handle it.”

It works like this – When you have a grip on something that’s now behind you; you can’t move forward into what God has put in front of you.

LET GO. Loosen that grip and let go… Release it and put it before God

It doesn’t matter where it came from, if it’s from God or if it’s not from God…

Just know that whatever happens in our lives, it all has to pass through His hands.

You have to release it to God so He can show you what it can become.

There is purpose in every pain.

A lot of times we may not know what we’ve learned until we’re on the other side of it.
You don’t really realize it until later. It’s later that you say, “It was good for me that I was afflicted, because this taught me that. It’s good for me that they told me no, because they were wrong for me anyway. If I would have married them, I would be in therapy right now. I would be divorced.”

It’s always so easy to say that on the other side of it.

It’s so easy to look back and say, “Well, God made a way where there was no way,” but
that’s when you’re looking back.

What really takes faith is to look forward at something and to believe He’s going to
make a way when you can’t see it. I know this is where I often fail.

But I’m trying.

The Enemy will always fight the hardest against the people who are carrying the greatest purpose.
If a lot is coming against you, that means God has put a lot in you.

Sometimes the only way God sets us free from certain things is He has to take them away.

Sometimes what God allows to be removed from our lives is just as important as what He allows to be brought into our lives.

Sometimes the only way God gets us to appreciate something is to allow it to leave.

What you’ve got to learn is to release these things. All God is doing in some of our lives in this season is showing us how little control we had to begin with. This is where faith steps in.

I think everyone has experienced this at one point or another in their life, and here’s the lesson:

I talked previously about how everyone has a story to tell, everyone has a ministry to share that can help others. My own ministry is that of loss, so most of my writing and what I have to share is based on that. I identify and share much with the lives of Job & Jonah in scripture. I have JOB 13:15 on my shoulder and the outline of Jonah’s whale on my ankle as constant reminders.

So, a lot of times in my life the lesson God is teaching me is to appreciate something.

Here’s what I want to ask you: What is God teaching you to appreciate in this season?

Very simple but maybe worth some reflection.

Maybe He’s teaching you to appreciate some things you had become so accustomed to or used to. Think about this, you get used to the things God gives you to the point that you can become used to the people God gives you.

You get used to the simple moments.

Things that used to be annoying you learn to appreciate. This is the meaning, the reason for your season of pain.

He’s revealing things to you that you did not appreciate enough, things you just took for
granted, things you just thought would always be this way.

Haven’t we all experienced this in our lives? Look at the pandemic…

One of the things that’s happening in this season for all of us is God is not only teaching
us to appreciate certain blessings, but he is resetting the baseline of what we consider a blessing. There’s a new baseline for being grateful that’s being given to us. Are you paying attention to that?

Before God gives us a new blessing, he wants to give us a new baseline.

Start with praising him… “Let everything that has breath praise the Lord. Praise the Lord!” (PSALM 150:6)

Did you just breathe?
Praise Him
Are you still here?
Praise Him
Did he wake you up?
Praise Him
Did he sustain you?
Praise Him

My new baseline to praise Him is just to say each morning “Thank you for keeping me alive.”

So start somewhere, anywhere you find gratefulness…

Start with the fact that He kept you alive another day.
Start with the fact that He loves you unconditionally.
Start with the fact that no matter what it is, your sins are forgiven.

Start learning to let go, and start learning a new baseline for praise.

Focus on Yourself

Focus on becoming the best version of yourself so people will be naturally drawn to you when you encounter them.

When you come to a place where you unconditionally love and accept yourself you create the space and opportunity for the right person to show up and love you and be loved by you.

You have to do the work on yourself, and at least have a vision of what you want and take action on it.